June 11, 2012

Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Andrew

(Legal disclaimer: Andrew's participation in today's Julia's Bookbag (henceforth known as 'blog') post was unwilling, under duress, and should in no way be construed as something he would participate in of his own accord inasmuch (LOVE that legal term!) the pictures and text herein were used without his express consent and/or knowledge, and therefore the fact that this written communication (henceforth known as 'blog post') exists will be held as leverage over the first party (henceforth known as 'Melissa') for as long as 'Melissa' requests any favor for the rest of her life.)

In honor of Father's Day approaching this weekend, I thought we'd spend more quality time this week focusing on the raison d'etre for my bloggy-- my husband Andrew. His invaluable tech support is the only reason I can keep blogging. Case in point: a few weeks ago, I clicked on the Julia's Bookbag homepage only to see a screen stating that Google was unable to find my blog. I ran screaming to Andrew, who calmly shrugged and said, "Huh. Guess the internet's broken." 

(He did in fact investigate and helped calm me down and taught me a tiny lesson about servers. It was all fine. But the point is that he calms me down on a daily basis. He's awesome that way. However, as you're going to see, he is not so awesome at being interviewed...or maybe he is...if you like short interviews where you don't find out anything) 

Melissa: Hey Andrew, I'm going to interview you! 
Andrew: What?
Melissa: For the blog!
Andrew: That's not going to happen.

(two days later)

Melissa: Let's do that interview!!
Andrew: Fine.

Melissa: What should we talk about?
Andrew: I don't know.

Melissa: What's your favorite movie?
Andrew: I don't know.

Melissa: What's your favorite food?
Andrew: I don't know.
Melissa: This joke isn't going to be funny much longer.
Andrew: It's not a joke.

Andrew: What's YOUR favorite movie or book?

pause

Andrew: If you have to think about it, you don't have one.
Melissa: I don't know!
Andrew: See?

Melissa: Can't we tell something about you?? SOME nugget of information??
Andrew: My name is Andrew.

Melissa: What would you like for Father's Day?
Andrew: Uh, privacy and internet anonymity?

Melissa: Do you love the cat more than me?

pause.

pause.

Andrew: (slowly) No.....

(Clearly some kind of cat conspiracy is afoot...)

Friends, that concludes our 'interview' (?). Please enjoy your day.

16 comments:

  1. I'm laughing like a mad woman! This is hilarious! Men and their cats... sigh :)

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    1. I was laughing like a mad woman when I wrote it! It doesn't take much to amuse myself. :)

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  2. Hahahaha! I love the third photo from the bottom... kitty is looking at you from the corner of her eye and likely saying, "Yeah, he loves me more than you. You know it. I know it. Get used to it, Melissa." ;)

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    1. Andrew keeps encouraging me to make friends with the cat. I'VE TRIED. She ain't having it.

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  3. That was hilarious! My husband has a Siamese, too. She is old and cranky, but loves him soooo much. I empathize.

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    1. Siamese cats are CRAZY. But also hilarious and very interesting. :)

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  4. Oh- WOW! Classic, absolutely classic. Thank you for this. hilarious. every single photo speaks volumes! Really, the interview speaks volumes. Hilarious!

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    1. I also should let you know that when I first decided to 'interview' him, the mere prospect caused me to laugh hysterically and dance around for about 10 minutes. I have no idea why, I just thought it was the funniest thing ever. Of course when I sat down to get something out of him, he refused to talk, but even when Andrew sits doing nothing, he can still manage to be somewhat amusing :)

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  5. This is flipping excellent!

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    1. You must know Miss Stephanie, that first and foremost with my blog, I seek to amuse myself...sometimes that results in some 'interesting' blog posts....:)

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  6. ha, ha, this is funny...sounds like what my husband's response would be

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  7. Well, I am not showing this to Noah-- he'll be finished with his grin and bear it cooperation for sure if I do!

    I always joke to Robyn that Noah and Trapper should start their own blog-- well the anti-blog. Perhaps Andrew would like to get in on that with them-- I suspect it would mostly be mockery of us which would probably be more popular than books which is just sad.

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    1. Oh Whitney....Andrew has long threatened to start a blog wherein he just mercilessly mocks blogging in general....And he has also threatened to start a website called 'Melissa in the Morning.com'.

      I know that 1) he'll never actually start these blogs but that 2)if he did, his blog would be sooooooo much more popular than mine on my best day. Sad. yes, I agree. Sigh.

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  8. The photos are awesome. I haven't tried to interview ben yet. Maybe I should put it on my list of things to do... :)

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    Replies
    1. Yes you should! yes yes! I was going to make Andrew write a post but decided that would be a tortuous exercise in futility, so I thought an interview would be easier...not sure it was any less tortuous....

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