I have many, many thoughts about Monopoly. Not many of them are good.
At one point during our game, Andrew looked at me and said, "Wow you get really....intense during this game."
Monopoly basically turns me into a crazed caricature of myself, and I'm already a crazed caricature of myself on a GOOD day. I think Monopoly reveals much of your inner being. My inner being is apparently a black, dark, bottomless void of malevolence.
Just sayin'! Happy fun times!
My mother said she was ashamed of me.
But I had a good reason! I was trying to prevent Julia from buying Boardwalk (SHE ALREADY HAD PARKPLACE) and having the most expensive monopoly in the game. Not only did she get that monopoly, she then BUILT HOTELS on both properties and wiped the floor with the rest of us.
(I hate this &^*%$@ card.)
Ok guess what? Turns out that my kiddo is the luckiest piece of sunshine in the universe and has crazy crazy good fortune in games. We've seen this time and again in various board games. The kid has really good feng shui, or whatever, but someone seriously needs to TAKE THIS GIRL TO VEGAS.
She lands on Free Parking, like, multiple times. (the way we play, everything you have to pay for a Chance or Community Chest card, or to get out of jail, goes into the middle, and if you land on the Free Parking spot, you get whatever pile o' cash is in the middle.) I landed on it once, got a huge pile of cash and still lost. Julia never gets sent to jail. It's all terribly unfair and unjust.
(Julia threw the dice like, 5 times, until I got this shot of the dice in the air. Please admire.)
(Andrew is trying to photobomb my railroad card.)
I have many Monopoly strategies, want to hear them?
Sometimes I hoard all my money. But then I don't own anything and I end up having to pay it all out on people's houses and hotels. OR, I try and buy everything, and then have no money. Or I try and buy the cheap properties and build hotels n' stuff on them, but then I still get hammered by certain little girls who BUY BOARDWALK. We played several times this past weekend and I can't figure out how she does it. She winds up with a bunch of property and tons of money. She gets every lucky card there is and doesn't land on any of my houses or hotels.
Near the end, I landed on Boardwalk with a hotel on it (that's $4000, yo), and at that point, I had nearly everything I owned mortgaged and I threw up my hands and yelled, I'M OUT! And giggled at the absurdity of losing so spectacularly. My mom lost even worse than I did, if that's possible, she literally lost every penny. My stepdad just shook his head and thanked the universe that my mom and I aren't really out there trying to make money in the real estate market.
It's super exciting that Julia is getting old enough for real and proper Big Kid Games. I can't wait for Clue.....
Someday I'll video my mother and I playing a board game. We're like banshees. There's a lot of yelling and keening and wailing and fake slapping. Sometimes the slapping isn't so fake. I think my poor stepdad got pinched several times. It's all really really fun!