a breakfast smoothie saga
April 22, 2015
I'm not going to show you anything new OR exciting today. What I'm going to relate to you, however, are yet more bon mots from my Very Amusing Husband. I wish I could properly convey how Very Extremely Difficult it is to get any kind of healthy food into this man. If he had his way, he'd start his day with a breakfast pastry of some kind, followed by salami sandwiches and chips for lunch, with something fried for dinner, followed by a huge bowl of some kind of sugary cereal before bed.
If he had his way.
Which he doesn't.
ANYWAY. The other day I brightly informed him that I was making a smoothie and I would share some with him. He didn't look happy. And he looked less so when he saw me throwing a handful of oats into my Magic Bullet. (BEST KITCHEN TOOL EVER.)
Because I am so very helpful, I'll list for you his litany of moans and complaints after he drank the freshly-made-smoothie-that-included-oats......
At the outset: "You don't drink OATS."
In the middle of the smoothie: "It gets dryer the further down you drink it."
Upon completion: "I'm hungrier and thirstier then when I started."
I told him that was impossible because I had made sure to put in a nice round scoop of protein powder in the smoothie. Then I had an epiphany right after he told me that he'd much rather get his protein "from bacon, as God intended." At this point I realized that I was married to Ron Swanson.
So even though my husband would rather have Pop-Tarts and/or doughnuts for breakfast, maybe there are a few of you who might actually like my smoothie, so I'll list it down for you:
Melissa's Thirst-Inducing Breakfast Smoothie (makes 2 small glasses or 1 big glass)
1/2 cup plain greek yogurt
1/2 to 3/4 sliced banana
a handful of blueberries or strawberries
1 scoop protein powder (I use this kind)
A splash of milk (either dairy, almond, or coconut)
2 ice cubes
a few sprinkles of cinnamon
a handful of rolled oats
1/2 cup or so of water
He's had to drink his smoothie twice now - after the first one, I was so delighted with the hilarity of his responses, I knew I wanted to put them on the blog, but our smoothies were already gone. So I had to make more another day for photographing purposes. I thought he was going to pass out when I presented him with another one of these creations. (I make smoothies of various sorts for him all the time, but he's never had my oat smoothies before - I LOVE them! There's just a faint whiff of oat-y flavor. I find this smoothie very pleasing and maybe you will too. Are your partners this hard to feed??)